The Man who Blinked too Rarely

He didn’t blink.

That is, he blinked, but he didn’t blink enough. Oh, it was enough to fool all those idiots down at the advertising department; I don’t know why I didn’t fire them all ages ago. But he couldn’t fool me. I noticed, the very first time I spoke to him. He blinked as an afterthought, as if he had to remind himself to do it once in a while, and that was how I knew.

Of course I had to do something. It was practically my company, I could not let my employees come to harm, just because they did not see the danger and I was too slow to act. So I made a plan that very evening to get rid of him.

It was easy really. The next day I just made sure to push a few deadlines forwards so everyone in the advertising department had to work a bit late. Then just as he was about to finish, I asked him to help me carry some boxes upstairs. I can act quite the damsel in distress if I have to. When we had two boxes left we were the only two people left in the building. So we put the last boxes in the office on the seventh floor, and I said:

‘Phew, those boxes were heavier than I thought,’ I fanned myself with one hand, ‘do you mind if I open the window?’

‘Not at all,’ he said. So I opened one of the large windows and lent my entire torso out of it.

‘Careful,’ he said, ‘that looks dangerous.’

‘It’s lovely,’ I said, ‘come, try it.’

He poked his head out of the window, and I wondered if he suspected that I knew.

‘Isn’t it nice to be cooled by the wind?’ I asked.

‘Yeah you’re right,’ he said and lent out a bit further. I felt in my guts that it was then or never, so I crouched down a bit, grabbed him just under the knees and tipped him over. Unfortunately, he managed to grab the windowsill, but I was quick. As he yelled something at me, I found a paperweight and smashed it down on his fingers until he let go. When he hit the pavement, I was satisfied that this robot would not be coming back.

However, his fake blood was rather well made. So well made in fact, that the police arrested me the next day.

But you, you’re smart like me. You won’t be fooled, will you?

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  1. sophiebowns

     /  February 27, 2013

    Wow! This is brilliantly written and really quite sinister!

  2. Very nice. I love the way the psychotic mind works…always do confident and logical in its insanity. Well captured in this piece.

  3. Good one! 😉


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